Turkey and Christopher Columbus
Aging and Attitude
Writers can be odd thinkers. Their thinking is not peculiar, insane, or eccentric; they think differently. In my case, thoughts of cooking a turkey attach themselves to Christopher Columbus, the explorer.
Thanksgiving is a week away and Columbus Day Sale events are fresh in my mind. I could purchase a turkey on sale and cook it perfectly.
A bigger issue may be fueling this association.
Christopher Columbus questioned conventional thinking that the earth was flat. He was a trailblazer.
I am not in his league, but why do ‘people in the know’ or chefs say, “cook a turkey breast side up”?
For years, I have secretly roasted a turkey breast side down. Recently, my discretion was revealed to a few close friends. They were speechless. Fearing they would consider me mentally ill, I explained.
“A turkey dries out breast side up as the juices sink to the bottom of the pan, so we baste the bird frequently. Why not turn the turkey upside down and stop opening the oven door?”
I was ready for their concerns and cautioned myself, do not mention your view on gravy.
“The bird will sit lopsided in the pan.” Several exclaim.
“So what, does it need a perfect tan?” I say.
“The pop-up button letting you know when it is done will not pop.” They announce in high-definition.
“The pop-up button doesn’t always pop-up.” I counter.
Christopher Columbus was not the only one to consider the earth might be round.
Perhaps I am not a lonely turkey renegade.
Please cast your vote below for breast up or breast down.